working on myself .. inside & out.

so a few days ago i made the choice to loose weight! yay me! right? i just didn't realize how hard it was -clears throat- okay so i knew. because this wasn't my first, second, or third attempt to loose weight ... actually it's abotu the 15th thousand.. but anyways, i've committed to it hard core. it just ALWAYS seems like something comes up. perfect example monday: we we're on our way to the gym and i got a ticket on a car i haven't used in 2 12 months (long story, another blog) so we went by my moms job to give to her. while we were there it started to down poor. so we get on base and the rain only gets harder so we return home. tuesday: we were suppose to go to the gym but me nor taylor could manage to get of bed ontime to go. after throughout the day there were so many reasons i couldn't ... i had to take care of my mother. WEDS! we finally went and i felt amazing! after i believe i wanted to also change my eatting habbits. so i went to farm fresh, made a salad, and enjoyed it. thursday i'm not sure why .. but we didn't go. i believe we went friday, and we went yesterday. but we didn't go today, so i did a 20 min little workout in my living room listening to my favorite music and can i mention i loved it!? im also cutting back on some foods .. yay me! right? SIKE! i miss chocolate already. and this not eatting after 7 thing is killing me. and it doesn't help that my lovely mother is trying to loose weight. but all that is working on myself on the outside. but i also want to work on myself on the inside. because i want to love who i am no matter my size, weight, or height. loosing weight is half the battle if i can't love myself for who i truly am. i want to work on my attitude with my family, and my friends. i want to feel more secure about who i am. and i've actually started by giving myself little compliments here and there ... and it works. somedays i look in the mirror and i see such a beautiful young lady. and other days i look in the mirror and see a fat lard with a hudge forehead, face and cheeks. but that's normal ... right? well regardless i'm going to bring in the new year sexy and confident. after all i'll be 18, a senior, and a brand new women (: